Posted by: Dr. Carolyn Edwards | May 4, 2012

Ask Dr. E – Relationships and Dating, Dating Online is it a Good Thing?

Are you stressed, overwhelmed, undecided or need direction?

Get your life, career, business, relationship and most pressing questions answered. Let Dr. E help you get moving in the direction of your dreams.

Dr. E, I need some dating advice. I am 45, been dating for the last few years but nothing has materialized into a relationship. I have been divorced for over ten years, worked on myself and finished my Master’s degree and doing well in my career. But I can’t seem to find the right man at the right time. A few friends recommended online dating but I don’t know where to start.  Please help, seeking a long-term relationship.

Dear Seeking,

Life is beautiful when you have a great friend and partner to share it with, however even when you don’t have a special relationship with another person, you can still be a great friend to yourself. Start by loving yourself, being happy in your life and surroundings. Go out and try new things. Take yourself to dinner, have a girls happy hour, take dance lessons, attend a lecture, go to the local coffee-house or library. The goal is to confidently enjoy your life because joy and success are contagious and attractive. People want to be around happy, confident people.

Make a list of all the attributes you want in a mate. Then make a list of all the attributes you bring to a relationship. Be realistic with your wants. If you want an attractive man who is in shape, healthy, wealthy, caring, respectful and has his own place, make sure you can say the same about you. Many times we have unrealistic expectations in a mate such as he has to be over six feet, with light brown eyes or drive a particular type of car.

Why not try online dating?  It can be the opportunity to meet all kinds of interesting people. Even if there is no love connection, it can boost your confidence in terms of communicating your wants and needs with others.

According to Online Dating Magazine, there are more than 280,000 marriages a year as a direct result of people meeting on an online dating service. There are free sites where you can look for online dates like Facebook and MySpace or others that charge for the service like eHarmony and If you choose to put up an online dating profile be honest about who you are, what is great about you and what you are seeking in a date as well as the type of relationship you’re seeking. Include a recent photo and have fun searching through the profiles.

Good luck,

Dr. E


Dr. Carolyn Edwards is a  life & career management coach, author and  professor.

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